We’ve all been there. You round the corner to your cubical ready to start the day’s work while you are suddenly accosted by the familiar stench of a co-worker’s bad breath.
“Here we go again…”, you imagine. “Another ‘H’-filled tirade that won’t ever permeate my ears because I’m too busy attempting to keep it from permeating my nose.”
“So anywahhhhy,” continues your co-worker, “Hhhhank Hhhhenshhhhaaw from Hhhhuman Reshhhhourcess told me ouhhhhhr 401k plahhhhn is an outstahhhhnding invehhhhhstment optiohhhhhn…”
Somehow, we’d like to believe that our forced smile and wilting eyelashes might tell the offending party that there’s something less than stellar about the way they are coming across. Unfortunately, that’s simply wishful thinking. The thing is that no one knows they will have a problem. We seem to be immune to your own stench, and unlike Willy Nelson’s muse, it’s never on our minds.
So how do you tell someone that their breathe is making you are having issues differentiating their head from their derriere? Sure, whether it’s someone you know and so are comfortable with, you can test honesty. Still, even honesty has it’s own set of problems. Can you play it off like it’s a one-time occurrence you merely noticed and hope that mentioning it requires care of the situation once and for all? Can you sit them down and also have a serious discussion which could ultimately embarrass them or make you appear to be the bad person? How will they react to either scenario? You’d want to be told if you had bad breath, wouldn’t you? Can you feel safe being told by this person who you have bad breath? You don’t know them well enough to be discussing this situation with them?
ブレスマイルウォッシュ are all important questions whose answers will vary with each unique situation. Still, there are some things you can avoid saying that are universal across all situations. I have taken the liberty of listing a few of them below. Remember, honesty is the foremost policy, but brutal honesty is often unnecessary.
# 1 Gee, is your breath or did I blow my nose right after wiping my ass?
# 2 And today here’s me with the elements: Thanks, me! Well it looks like there’s a stank front moving due east from wherever your mouth happens to be. We’re looking at a 100% potential for Halitosis throughout the rest you will ever have. Sports is next accompanied by todayï¿½s lottery numbers. Stay Tuned!
# 3 I don’t mean to be rude but your horrible breath is melting my face. To possess to stand here and pay attention to you is agonizingly painful. Hey, you ever note that “Alien” movie where in fact the alien is sucking in Sigourney Weaver’s face and she just cringes because the thing is so scary and because it’s saliva is an acid that can eat through metal? This can be a lot like that because even though your saliva won’t eat through metal, I’m fairly certain your mouth-stench will and that is scaring the crap outta me, my pal. Again, I don’t mean to be rude…
This is why, dear reader, one must choose carefully when approaching a topic this sensitive. Perhaps honesty isn’t always the best policy. Better yet, you will want to just leave an anonymous note…and a breath mint.